Tuesday, May 18, 2010
Telling Your Story
Saturday, we had Meg Brady, a Folk Arts teacher at the University of Utah whose job is collecting and teaching people how to collect stories through Hospice and the Huntsman Cancer Center. She presented the whys and the myths of reminiscing and telling your story. I have understood the one side to the importance of telling our story; so it doesn't go to the grave with you, so our children and grand children get to know what our lives were like, to share what it was like in "the olden days." I didn't understand until this presentation how important telling our story is for the storyteller. She said in England they pay to have people facilitate reminiscing in old folks homes because the residents are more sociable and more connected with the present. So remembering the past doesn't mean that we are living in the past. More importantly, she talked about how by talking about and writing about our past that we begin to see the patterns of our lives, that our lives and the incidents of our lives are not just random occurrences but that they are a part of a life pattern. That makes our lives have meaning and we may not even understand what that meaning was until we write or revisit the events at the end of our lives. We may begin to see the theme of our lives and better understand the importance of why we were here. I had an epiphany today, that this is probably what we have to do when we die. We go to the writing room and begin to write our memoirs. We have to get this done before we can go hang out with God and get on with the next part. So if you've written your own history and thoroughly evaluated your life, you are ready to move on, otherwise you will be hanging out in the writing room for some time first. Do you hear that Dad, Roberta, Aunt Margie, me?
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I have had the idea that writing memoirs is very important in our development as a spirit, in our summing up of what just happened here. Guess that is why they can be so tough to write, especially if you are wrestling with some extremely difficult issues such as molestation and alcoholism. I have written my memoirs three or four different times. I wrote one version back when I was sending stuff to an agent, I think in case I died sooner than expected. I didn't die so went back to do some more versions and in each one the digging has been deeper and tougher. I think I must be in hard rock now. Nothing is coming easy.
ReplyDeleteWhen I heard Rolain's hair all fell out I just could not continue. I told her that, and she said why is that, it doesn't have anything to do with me! I pointed out how it did, and was amazed and shocked that she was not nearly so touchy after she had almost got through cancer treatment. But I am still mindful of her condition, so don't know when I will be able to get through the part most affecting her, the behavior of the second molester and I do not even intend to cover anything but my relationship with him. Now that his relatives are reading it I find it incredibly hard to continue, yet that might be part of the divine plan, too. Which is why we were allowed to invent the internet. Ha People access the Internet now you never thought would. I can't give up my readers on the Internet but now that is also causing me a big problem, like beaming it to the whole world. Well 450 cities from 38 countries people have checked in. That adds another element to memoir writing not dreamed of in the old days.
Mine is under the bed...but I'm going to drag it out and rewrite. I need to cut parts too. Add others. AFTER I GET THIS BOOK ACTUALLY PUBLISHED IN MY HAND. Oh yes, maybe I can take a look at my soul and see what kind of shape it's in.
ReplyDeleteFor sure this is a good idea to write the pass to get it under your belt and maybe a different prospective. It helps to find a pattern in your life that you are repeating and repeating until you learn how to do differently. The changes of old patterns comes long and hard sometimes.
ReplyDeleteI think as you grow old and know death will be coming along any time you do reminisce much more about the patterns of your life and ponder how you might have done things differently and hopefully better. Mostly you have to accept that it is what it is. I suppose I"ll go through many words in the writing room and I hardly expect to get right along with hanging out with God. I do hope we get to use computers with spell check to do our versions and revisions. Also it would be good to graduate from this room some day. I don't want to spend eternity in the rehash of this life. I do a lot of it in dreams.
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