I spent my Christmas holiday falling head over heels in love with my granddaughter. She has been my granddaughter for almost a year and I have been quite smitten with her before this holiday but it become that crazy kind of love and I think she loves me back in a similar way. It is also a painful love because it is so much harder to depart from. I miss her before I even walked out the door. I recall in any moment her amazing blue eyes and pouty lips. I think about all I want for her in the future. Tonight at Women’s Council it struck me what I want really for her and for her mother and that is for both of them to have a whole bunch of incredible women in both of their lives. If they do not have sisters (sorry Geneya) then let them have wonderful women friends. Let those friends be the ones they choose but also let them find those friends among their family in their cousins, aunts, and grandmothers. I have been so blessed to have my life be full of the most incredible women you can imagine. It all started with my mother. My every thought went from my lips and through her good thinking and wisdom for the first 30 years of my life. I also had my heart grandmother and my work grandma to love me and to teach me. I now find my aunts have become incredible friends and great models for aging and thinking and creating. I spent last night at Aunt Ann’s sharing a task but also sharing conversations that truly matter. I was truly blessed with the most amazing sister anyone could have. I feel incomplete without my daily phone call. She is like my right arm. When she hurts I still cry just like when were little. I also have cousins that are some of my best friends. I discover regularly how much I enjoy being with them. I also have some really great girl friends. I thought this was what you get and then you nourish these relationships to extend to the end of your life but with my move to Boulder I have found a whole new batch of incredible women. It is such a pleasant surprise to find the opportunity for new friends with new practices and ideas for this next part of my life. So thank you to my women. You are why I am a positive person, why I believe I can accomplish most anything, why I have remained married for these thirty years, why my ideas and thoughts become even better, why I am blessed.
Yes, being a grandmother is wonderful and I know you'll enjoy your special times with your grandkids more every year. I love seeing each one. I love knowing neices and nephews and sharing lives and kids. As we, the older generation, moves on...our kids and grandkids and great grands replace us...as we replace our grands, our parents, and aunts and uncles. We have a rich heritage.
ReplyDeleteI did think that was a precious picture of your granddaughter with you holding her. It showed her blue blue eyes and you said pouty lips, I said bee stung. I can still recall Geneya walking around looking so tiny as she bossed her tall parents. I do think a caring and close knit family is worth working for, and you have certainly worked hard keeping up a family web site that gives the family a chance to share particularly family oriented news and events. You have also encouraged the aunts to start discussions on there and whatever else they think belongs on a family website, but this has proved to be a very valuable means to share news everyone needs to know about fast, so they can send healing thoughts and awareness and look for other ways to be supportive. I also thought an outstanding event of this year was the publication of the book "Women" which I thought was sure to inspire feelings of pride in family in all who have ever lived in Boulder or have a connection to those who did.
ReplyDeleteFrom my friend Nedra.
ReplyDeleteA thought to share.....
"I just finished taking an evening class at Stanford. The last lecture was
on the mind-body connection--the relationship between stress and disease.
The speaker (head of psychiatry at Stanford) said, among other things, that
one of the best things that a man could do for his health is to be married
to a woman whereas for a woman, one of the best things she could do for her
health was to nurture her relationships with her girlfriends. At first
everyone laughed, but he was serious.
Women connect with each other differently and provide support systems that
help each other to deal with stress and difficult life experiences.
Physically this quality "girlfriend time" helps us to create more
serotonin--a neurotransmitter that helps combat depression and can create a
general feeling of well being. Women share feelings whereas men often form
relationships around activities. They rarely sit down with a buddy and talk
about how they feel about certain things or how their personal lives are
going. Jobs? Yes. Sports? Yes. Cars? Yes. Fishing, hunting, golf? Yes.
But their feelings?--rarely. Women do it all of the time. We share from our
souls with our sisters, and evidently that is very good for our health. He
said that spending time with a friend is just as important to our general
health as jogging or working out at a gym.
There's a tendency to think that when we are "exercising" we are doing
something good for our bodies, but when we are hanging out with friends, we
are wasting our time and should be more productively engaged--not true. In
fact, he said that failure to create and maintain quality personal
relationships with other humans is as dangerous to our physical health as
smoking! So every time you hang out to schmooze with a gal pal, just pat
yourself on the back and congratulate yourself for doing something good for
your health! We are indeed very, very lucky. Sooooo let's toast to our
friendship with our girlfriends. It's very good for our health."
Yes, I always thought anyone was terribly handicapped who didn't have five older sisters to love and to teach them. As my sisters have passed I've been blessed with great nieces. Great friends and their kids and grand kids who were easy to love. Nice blog Cheryl. Your mom would be so proud of what a special woman you have became. Both you and Colette are exceptional people and exactly what a special mom like yours deserved.
ReplyDeleteEven though I'm not a woman, I still feel incredibly influenced by some of the same women who influenced you. I feel fortunate that we have both have had those same influences. Strong women! Boulder is a unique place for strong women, I definitely see that. Great writing, Cheryl...
ReplyDelete